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reduce stress by changing internal dialogue
change internal dialogue to reduce stress

Forging a positive thought process is a choice that not only stops the negative internal dialogue that stresses us moms, but can help us improve our physical and mental health.

“Is it okay? “I'm worried” was the first thing I asked the person who performed my first sonogram when I was going to have my first child. What she answered was: “get used to it, from now on that's what you're going to do for the rest of your life, you're going to worry about your son,” she told me, while writing down my baby's measurements on her computer. A little anxiety and anguish immediately struck me. The worst part is that he was right.

As a mother, you worry about everything with your kids. When they are babies, you worry if they are breathing when they sleep, if they are in pain, if they are developing in a typical way. When they walk, what if they fall, what if they get hurt. When they go to school, if they are being treated well, if they are a victim of bullying. When they are a teenager, if they have friends, if they are into something they shouldn't be, if they want to go out in the car with a friend, if their heart is broken, well, the worry never ends and we fill ourselves with negative thoughts without realizing that they can cause us a lot of stress and therefore problems with our health. Not to mention wrinkles and hair loss.

Do you see the glass half empty or half full?

Your answer to this question speaks volumes about your perspective on life. According to Mayo Clinic staff, “some studies show that personality traits can affect many areas of your health and well-being.” The positive thinking that usually comes with optimism is a key part of effective stress management. And effective stress management is associated with many health benefits. If you tend to be pessimistic, stress levels tend to be higher and affect your long-term health. If you tend to see the glass half empty, don't worry, there are ways to create the habit to change your perspective. Here, I'll tell you how to reduce stress by changing your internal dialogue.

First you have to understand what positive thoughts are

Positive thinking does not mean ignoring everyday problems and living in lalaland, rather it means approaching the difficult and unpleasant in a positive and productive way INTENTIONALLY. So you choose to believe that the best will happen and not the worst. I understand that it is easier said than done, but read on.

Positive thinking often begins with self-talk. The endless stream of thoughts that run through your head are often incessant and can easily become pessimistic. Part of this internal dialogue comes from logic and reason. Other parts may arise from misconceptions due to lack of information, false expectations or preconceived ideas of what may happen.

If the thoughts that go through your head are mostly negative, it is likely that your outlook on life is pessimistic. If your thoughts are mostly positive, you are an optimist. The important thing is to recognize habits that do not benefit us in order to change them. We need to face it to be able to fix it.

The benefits of positive thinking for health

Do you need incentives to become an optimistic mom? Below, I tell you some. According to the Mayo Clinic, these are some of the benefits that optimists can enjoy:

· Lower rates of depression

· Lower levels of distress and pain

· Greater resistance to diseases

· Better psychological and physical well-being

· Better cardiovascular health and lower risk of death from cardiovascular disease and stroke

· Reduction in the risk of death from cancer

· Reduction in the risk of death due to respiratory conditions

· Reduction in the risk of death from infections.

· Better coping skills during difficulties and times of stress.

It is also believed that positive and optimistic people tend to live longer and healthier lifestyles. Since optimists tend to do more physical activity, follow a healthier diet, and do not smoke or drink alcohol excessively. In addition, they tend to look younger than they are for the reasons mentioned above. BIG INCENTIVE!

Now how do you know if you let your internal dialogue be mostly negative? Well most of the time:

· You magnify the negative aspects of a situation

· You always blame yourself for everything when something is not right

· You automatically anticipate the worst

· You blame others for what happens to you and avoid responsibility when you have it

· You blow things way out of proportion.

· You are a perfectionist, maintaining standards that are impossible to achieve

· You see things only as good or bad. There is no middle ground.

If you recognize one or more of the points above, you have a tendency to be negative or pessimistic.

Good news, you can become an optimist if you decide to

The process is simple, although not necessarily easy, it requires time, practice and INTENTION; after all, you are creating a new habit.

To be more positive:

· Identify areas of your life that you generally think negatively about. For example, the decisions you make with your children.

· Flip the script, instead of thinking about the worst that can happen, think about the best that can happen, especially if the situation is out of your control.

· Give yourself permission to laugh, especially during difficult times. Look for humor in everyday events. It is proven that laughter reduces stress.

· Exercise for at least 30 minutes most days of the week or have periods of 5 or 10 minutes during the day. Exercise can positively affect your mood and reduce stress.

· Surround yourself with positive people who you can trust to give you helpful advice and feedback. A Harvard University study determined that a majority of a person's success depends on the people they associate with. Try to avoid the negative as it will increase your stress level.

· Practice and be intentional, tell your brain what to think. You are the boss of your thoughts, repeat this to yourself often.

How to put positive thinking into practice

Here I give you some examples:

Negative self-talk Positive thinking

I've never done it before - It's an opportunity to learn something new.

It's too complicated - I'll try another way.

I don't have the resources - I will be creative looking for ways to achieve this.

That takes a lot of time - What's worth it takes time.

It is too radical a change - Change is an opportunity to improve.

I think I didn't make the right decision - I made the best decision with the information I had

I don't know if I'm raising my son right - I'm doing the best I can

The secret is to PRACTICE positive thoughts every day, don't expect to become optimistic overnight. However, with practice, eventually your internal dialogue will contain less self-criticism and more self-acceptance. Practicing this habit will create new energy that will attract positive things. Fake it 'til you make it. Trust me, you will see a change in your life.

ARE YOU AN OPTIMIST OR A PESIMIST? Take our quiz to determine what your tendency is.


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